Bad Attitude

I think I was in denial about this, but my company is sending me on a business trip for a conference across the country tomorrow. I am sad and resentful to be away from my family. Jen pointed out that we have never been apart since we started dating years ago.

The office manager at work found out that I was being sent to the conference and she said I was lucky. I responded that I was actually upset to be away from my son. Her response floored me. She said, “Oh, enjoy the break!” I just smiled, but I was thinking, “Why would I want a break from my kid?” This is woman who told me that day care was a great thing.

This conversation got me thinking. My boss is going to the conference almost a whole day early. I asked him why and he said he didn’t like being rushed. He works 12 hour days easy. He’s a vice president, so he might have to, but why go to a conference a day early?

Do people work to avoid there families?

My co-workers are nice and all, but for me, I would take Jen and lil’ guy any day. The only thing I am really looking forward to on this trip is reading on the plane.

Why I may be going to law school

Housewife asked when did the law school thing happen. All I can say is that it’s been a long time coming. I took the LSATs a couple of years ago. I wasn’t really sure if I wanted to go, but I thought I would just study, and then take the test. I had horrible test anxiety, and didn’t sleep at all the night before. In my test taking section, I was the oldest one in the room by a decade. I thought to myself, “What are you doing here, Googie?”

But I did pretty well on the test. Then, Jen said to me, “Googie, you can have a baby or you can go to law school, but you can’t do both.” I choose the baby, of course. But once lil’ guy was here, I pointed out to my wife that some cash right about now would be nice. We decided that I would just apply to some law schools around town to see what happened. To my great surprise (and I mean that) I got into my first choice. They call when they accept you, and I seriously thought they had made a mistake. I kept asking Jen, “Do you think they put my application in the wrong pile?” She assured me that they were pretty careful about these things.

I have to admit, I am still not 100% certain, but I think I’m going.

My offline friends have asked me why I want to be a lawyer. I think because I am a lesbian, they expect a mooney answer like I want to save blind kitty cats from global warming, or something like that. The truth is I want to go because 1. I think I have the brain for it 2. I am horribly bored with the industry I am in now 3. somebody around here needs to start making some serious money.

Jen and I want to have more children. They will need braces, vacations, toys and if you live in Boston, money for private school tuition. Our hope is that I will make enough when I get out for Jen to stay at home with the kids while I work.

So that is the law school story.

Not to brag but....

I think my son could have modelled for Raphael, had he lived in Florence in the 16th century.

Scrumptious Saturday

Last week, my wife and I were watching Postcards from Buster. I think our son was asleep. The Canadian family Buster was visiting was making a homemade pizza. We immediately became obsessed with making our own homemade pizza even though we are both on diets. We are highly impressionable like that. We found a recipe in Cooking Lite, and we even made the dough and the tomato sauce ourselves! Dare I say it, it tasted even better than a pizzerias!

Here’s a picture, because I am a geek who takes pictures of her food.

Older, but not terribly mature

I had a lot of complications with my pregnancy starting right at the get go. I won’t distress you with the details, but I was in and out of the hospital a lot. There was a lot of paperwork involved, and right on top of each section was the warning “Advanced Maternal Age.” But I am only 35! I would protest. It’s not like I was that 60 year old woman who just had twins. But there it was in black and white, an older mother.

Now that I have been admitted to law school, I keep getting these emails from one of the universities where I have been accepted. Apparently they have a group for students like me, its “the Older and Wiser group.” I just got an email from them today. My first reaction was, “gasp”, and them “f***ck u!” I’m so not going to that school.

By the way, I did decide on a school, one without and older law students’ league. I sent in my first deposit today. It still doesn’t feel real. I’ll believe it when I sign the promissory note for the 100,000 loan.

Fever rising!

We have been having a crazy week here. My son’s been sick with that nasty virus that has flayed all of the kids around here. I have never seen him so sick. We have been back and forth to the doctor’s, and even went running to the hospital because his temperature hit 104.5. My wife took two days off of work, and I had to work from home two days. For those of you who aren’t paying attention, that meant I wasn’t in the office for two days in my third week of work! My boss was pretty nice about it, but I’m afraid he is thinking, “I’m never hiring a woman again.”

Meanwhile, I have been trying to get a project out the door and take care of a sick baby at the same time. When I first went back to work, I was trying to be zen like about it. I tried to work when I was at work, and be with my baby when I was at home. But this week, I’ve had to do both at once, which of course means I’m doing neither well. The kid is the priority though, I just hope I don’t get fired.

So as of this moment,

• I haven’t brushed my teeth
  
• I am still in my pajamas
  
• House is a disaster
  
• Dog hasn't been walked
  
• Lil’ guy is in front of the television
  
• Project isn’t done
  
• Emails/calls have not been made
  

But, Googie Baba, I hear you say, you updated your blog. Yeah. I know.

See ya Travaglini, adios, good-bye, don't let the door hit you on the way out

Bastard

Congratulations Therese Murray.

Gee, we replaced Finneran with DiMasi, Romney with Patrick, and now Traviglini with Murray, maybe there is a Higher Power after all

A Public Service Announcement

Is it just me, or have we been having a pretty homophobic year already. It’s like a race to go on record as being against gay people. On many levels, I don’t really care who thinks homosexuality is immoral. If it’s against your religion, that’s your business. What I do care about is being treated equally under the law. I want to know that I will be able to visit my wife in the hospital and make medical decisions for her if necessary. I want to know that if something were to happen to me, she would be recognized as lil’ guy’s mother. I want to know that, god forbid, one of us becomes a born again Christian, and decides that homosexuality is evil, the other mother will have half a chance in court.

And here’s the rub. We live in a democracy, and those DOMA bills that have been passing all over the country, have been absolutely devastating to gay families. So I do have to concern myself with what others think of my life. Right now, there are 200 people whose opinion I am extremely interested in. They are the members of the Massachusetts State Legislator.

So, if you live in Massachusetts, and you live in one of these cities: East Brookfield, Oxford, Southbridge, Spencer, East Longmeadow, Springfield or Methuen, you have some work to do. Your state reps are brand spanking new, and have not declared their position on same sex marriage. Give them a call. They really do care what their constituents think.

Just to make it easy (thank-you Mass Merrier!) here is the contact info for each of them:

Charlton, East Brookfield, Oxford, Southbridge, Spencer
Representative Geraldo Alicea
State House
Room 437
Boston, MA 02133
617-722-2425

East Longmeadow, Springfield
Angelo J. Puppolo, Jr.
State House
Room 146
State House
Boston, MA 02133
(617) 722-2011

District Office
2341 Boston Road, Suite 204
Wilbraham, MA 01095
413-596-4333

Metheun
Representative Linda Dean Campbell
State House
Room 437
Boston, MA 02133
617-722-2425

My family and I thank-you.

Happy Birthday Sweetheart

Things have been so crazy at our place since the baby was born, we have not celebrated birthdays properly. It’s my wife’s birthday, and I wanted everyone to know how much I love her.


At the end of the movie Babel, the director dedicates the movie to his children, calling them two bright lights in the darkest night. That line made me cry. Jen and my son are my two bright lights.

What I love about Jen is:

• She is the most emotionally generous person I ever met
  
• She loves to dance
  
• She is great with kids
  
• She has long beautiful hair
  
• Her incredible intelligence is coupled with an astonishing lack of ambition
  
• Her socks never match
  
• She spends her entire day taking care of seriously ill kids. She has fallen in love with many of these kids, but still has had to watch them die. Amazingly, this has never dampened her enthusiasm for life
  
• She is a great mother
  

I hope you have a wonderful birthday.

Love,
Your wife

Friday!

We made it through one week! My lil’ guy seems to still know who I am. And the best part is that we get to hang out all day tomorrow. I am not doing an ounce of housework. I am just going to play with my baby.

Here are a few things that have happened to me in the last week that haven’t happened in a long time:

• A guy tried to pick me up! He asked me if I was married. I said yes. He asked where my husband was and then he was confused when I said I didn’t have a husband.
  
  
• A lady tried to get me to come to her church. One of the many nice things about being a SAHM is that you cut down dramatically on those encounters.
  
  
• Honest to god – I almost sat in shit this morning. Someone had defecated on the bus.
  

For this I am separated from my flesh and blood.

Adjustment Disorder

When I was first sober, I was in therapy. My therapist diagnosed me with Adjustment Disorder. I felt like that sounded kinda of mild. Things inside my head were very dramatic and earth shattering. Adjustment disorder sounded like I needed to floss more regularly or something.

I am beginning to see the wisdom of that diagnoses. I really do have a hard time with transitions. My lil’ guy is having an easier time of it. He seems to be enjoying day care. He is really easy going and loves being around people. At first I thought, maybe he gets that from his sperm donor. I am not like that at all. But something occurred to me the other day. Maybe if I hadn’t been brought up in an actively alcoholic home, maybe I would be more easy going as well. Maybe my constant anxiety is not an ingrained trait. If my father had gotten some help, I might have had an easier time growing up.

The Scoop

Mostly, I was very bored. My computer got confiscated in China, or some such. My manager had scheduled training for me, but he kept getting called away to conference calls. He left me with a software manual – but no computer! I sat and read the manual. I was sad and lonely without my little boy.

Almost everyone in the office is from MIT. I understand maybe every third word. They laugh uproariously at each other jokes. I scratched my head.

Lil’ guy did great in daycare. Every time I called I could hear him having fun in the background. He slept 1 ½ hours for his first nap, but refused a second. I was really glad to see him when I got home.

I made it through the day. I can’t believe I have to do it all again tomorrow.

The Night Before

I am having a hard time with this. I just can't believe that tomorrow he is going to spend his whole day with someone who is not me.

All Set for Tomorrow

Here are the things I have laid out for my first day back at work

• Pack and play for lil' guy to take his naps in
  
• Supply of diapers
  
• Bag of "transitional objects" to make his transition to day care easier. They include a few books, his Curious George monkey and a truck
  
• Set of clothes for lil' guy
  
• My shoes
  
• Immunization Records and other paperwork
  
• My purse with reading material (The New Yorker magazine)
  
• Picture of me and my baby for me to look at during work hours
  

*sniff*

There are a few things I can't put out yet, but I need to remember - my lunch, his bottle of soy milk, his shoes and my work outfit.

If I have the energy tomorrow, I will log on and let everyone know how it all went.

Lentil and Vegetable Puree

This recipe is for Kim at Maddbabies. It is from the book, The Healthy Baby Meal Planner. She is looking for vegetarian recipes for her babies. This one is super easy and really nutritious. We are not vegetarians over here, but we try to get a lot of vegetables into lil’ guy’s diet.

Lentil and Vegetable Puree

2 Tablespoons butter
1 cup, sliced, washed leek
1 ½ cup chopped carrots
¼ cup split red lentils
1 ½ cup vegetable broth or water
1 cup cauliflower florets
½ apple, peeled, cored and chopped

Melt the butter and sauté the leek for about 5 minutes. Add the carrots and continue to cook for 2-3 minutes. Add the lentils and broth, bring to a boil, then cover and simmer for about 15 minutes. Add the cauliflower and apple and cook for another 15 minutes or until the lentils and vegetables are tender. Puree to the desired consistency.

Makes 8 portions (theoretically)

Speaking of vegetables, I am snacking on raw carrots right now, which is really unlike me. Since I am going back to work and will be unhappy separated from my baby, I decided I might as well go back on Weight Watchers. Now, my misery is complete.